Yer’ momma. Yer’ daddy. Your sister. They’re all tough to buy gifts for. Not car people, though. No way. And definitely not when you have this All-Season Gift Guide at the ready. You’re probably asking why you’d even be shopping for car people…and we say…why the heck not? Gifts are fun. Especially when they’re cheap, useful, and totally random.
The Car Salesperson
Easy one here. Purell, in its weird, not-quite verifiably clean gooey way, will keep your dealer slinging autos clear through flu season. Don’t stop there, though. If the salesperson has one of those out-in-the-open desks they work from, think hard on something cool they can display on it. Like a gourd. Or anashtray. Or an ashtray-gourd.
Mechanics are, hopefully, good with their hands. Engine surgeons and carburetor manipulating extraordinaires. They also like beer and cigarettes. So it’s a good bet they know how to open a bottled beer with a plastic lighter. (Cup the skin between the thumb and fore finger on your non-dominant hand over the bottle cap, place a Bic lighter at a 45 degree angle from the cap base with the lighter lip under the teeth of the cap, and use your dominant hand to lever the cap off by forcing the lighter down. Works like a charm.) A case of Bud (bottles!) and a package of Bics will go a long way to maintaining a good relationship with someone you need to trust.
The Lady From The Gas Station
She’s the unheralded princess of petroleum often forgotten in the bustle of our lives. (Anecdote…now). Unbeknownst to me, my brother and friends on a Labor Day Bay Area Saturday, the Lady From The Gas Station proved essential in saving our night. We needed a way to get back to San Francisco from Sausalito for a show that night, but didn’t know where the ferry was. So we popped into a gas station, where the Lady pointed us towards an SF-bound ferry. After bypassing the pedestrian-only line and schmoozing into the much shorter bicyclist line, we perched ourselves on the top deck. There were beers in our bags, some loose-leaf tobacco in our pockets and a sun disappearing over the Bridge, and we imbibed. And who, in our mellow mood, was standing over the balcony below? The Lady From The Gas Station.
It was an impromptu and memorable gift. All with a penchant for song, we broke into a Lady-centric thank you. A feet-stomping, hand-clapping, chorus-ringing tune:
“Lady From The Gas Station, don’t know who you are, don’t know where you’re from, you’re the Lady From The Gas Station…”, over, and over….and over. She looked up, smiled, and waved goodbye when we docked in Tiburon, and the ferry turned back to the city.
These are the three most important car people to buy gifts for, the ones that (literally and figuratively) hold the keys to getting us going, keeping us going, and helping us to where we’re going. If you can trust these folks, it’ll do wonders for your car karma. And the best way to do that is by gifting in a memorable and unique way. Being remembered is a whole lot better than being forgotten, and if you use this guide as a starting point, your chances of being remembered are solid.