Even the Hollywood elite need to get from Point A to Point B. For a bit of mid-week fun, we had Cam imagine what a few of our favorite actors would sound like if they were negotiating for new cars on CarWoo!
And Now, Famous Actors Buying Cars…
Marlon Brando Buying a Car
Marlon Brando: “I really hate to return this Chevy Silverado LTZ, but when I found out it wouldn’t fit in my garage….the horror….the horror…”
Dealer: “It’s OK, things happen. Don’t beat your-“
Brando: “”You don’t understand! It coulda had class. It coulda been a contender. It could’ve been something, instead of a reject, which is what I am.”
Dealer: “Ooookay. Ummm, do you have the lease agreement?”
Brando: “Let me ask my wife. Stellla!!! Hey, Stelllllla!!!”
Roy Scheider Buying a Car
Dealer: “This is the new FIAT 500 Convertible- it’s very city friendly and fuel conscious.”
Roy Scheider: “We’re gonna need a bigger trunk.”
Clark Gable Buying a Car
Dealer: “So here we are Mr.- Gable, is it? What kind of equipment package did you want for your Ford F-150 XLT?”
Clark Gable: “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn.”
Dealer: “Please don’t call me dear.”
Michael Douglas Buying a Car
Michael Douglas: “I think I’d like to buy a Toyota Camry, this time in blue.”
Dealer: “Didn’t you just purchase two Camrys last week?”
Douglas: “I did, but not in blue. You see, greed, for lack of a better word, is good.”
Tom Cruise Buying a Car
Dealer: “I just can’t get a read on what kind of a car you’re looking for, Mr. Cruise.”
Tom Cruise: “Help me help you! Help me…help you, to find a car I can take home today.”
Dealer: “OK, how about this Nissan Altima over here? It’s stylish, functional, and not too bad on the wallet.”
Cruise: “Porsche. There is no substitute.”
Dealer: “What’s that?”
Cruise: “I feel the need.
Dealer: “The need for wh-
Cruise: “The need for speed!” (With bug eyes and giant grinning teeth)
Dealer: “Oh, you want a fast car? Why don’t we take a look over-
Cruise: “Show me the Ford Escape!! Show me the Escape!!!”
Dealer: “You like interrupting people, don’t you?”
Cruise: “Did you know that Qantas doesn’t fly to Los Angeles out of Cincinnati?”
Jack Nicholson Buying a Car
Dealer: “Hey, Mr. Nicholson, nice to meet you.”
Jack Nicholson: “Heeere’s Johnny!”
Dealer: “Actually my name’s Jerry, and I’ve got the perfect car for you- a Ford Fusion!”
Nicholson “….Is this is as good as it gets?”
Dealer: “It’s a pretty good car, Jack.”
Nicholson: “You think so, huh? Well, that’s because you can’t handle the Kia Optima!”
Harrison Ford Buying a Car
Dealer: “Well, Mr. Ford, dismissing your last name, I’ve got a 1996 Honda Civic for you.”
Harrison Ford: “It belongs in a museum!”
Dealer: “Well, I agree it’s a little older, OK, this is not the car you’re looking for.”
Ford: “Get off my plane!!”
Dealer: “We’re standing in a car dealership….Oh, I can’t play cool- I just have to say, I love you…in Blade Runner.”
Ford: “I know.”
Jeff Bridges Buying a Car
(Jeff Bridges unavailable due to voiceover commitment for a new Hyundai commercial)
Keanu Reeves Buying a Car
Dealer: “So Keanu, there must be a vehicle shortage for ya in LA, huh?”
Keanu Reeves: “Not so far.” (With great delivery)
Dealer: “Ah, just out for a new ride then? Alright, what do you think about this brand new Toyota Corolla?”
Reeves: “Whoa.”
Christian Bale Buying a Car
Dealer: “Mr. Bale, how about we test drive this Chevy Cruze?”
Christian Bale: “No! No! What is it with you, man? All like daa daa duh duh in the background!”
Dealer: “Sorry, I had to take that call. I’m just trying to get you the car you want.”
Bale: “Ohhhh, good for you. Well, I hope you’re happy, because it’s @#$%*&! ruined now!”
Dealer: “No, no, it’s just the glare from the sun, see?”
Bale: “Good, because I’ve got to return some video tapes.”
Dealer: “Oh, cool, we can do that on the test drive! You know, you’re actually a pretty nice guy. You hungry? I could go for some food, too.”
Bale: “Dorsia. I can get us a table.”
